Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Two Things

Thing 1


I have about 17,987 (approx.) blog posts I've been working on, but they've all been while I'm doing everything else in the world.   They're all in my head.  At some point I may get them down onto paper (um, how archaic), erm typed into my spiffy word processor and then you will benefit from them.  Truly you will.  Even if it's only to think "Wow, I'm way so much less f*ed up than her."  Assuming you swear.  If you don't you might use a different word.


Thing 2


I just had to call two different customer service departments to find out where my supposedly-delivered package may have gone.  Since it wasn't actually delivered as far as we can see.  I was not upset in any way shape or form, mostly just following the process I thought I needed to in order to get a resolution.  I know that customer service people are trained to speak in a non-confrontational manner, including apologizing for inconvenience, etc.


My experience with both reps was good...but throughout the whole thing - with both of them, mind you - I got the impression that they were trying to make sure they weren't going to become my verbal punching bag.  Since I wasn't even starting to sound upset, I'm guessing that it's a knee jerk reaction because they do get those types.


Which makes me mad.  I mean, stuff happens.  It really does.  I just don't get why anyone would feel the need to freak out at some person on the other end of the phone because something didn't go their way.  Most reputable companies have a resolution process...and their c.s. people get paid to help you through that...not to take shit-storms of abuse because you didn't get your *insert random item*.    


I'm not perfect by any means (as anyone who has been near me at work can attest, and I can't even completely blame it on PMS or anything either, darnit), but I try to make sure that I'm not crapping all over other people even when I'm not happy about something.   


Perspective is a good thing.


So is karma. 


(And okay, Thing 2 was a bit of a soapbox rant, but I can admit it.  Plus, my blog!  Ha!)


Thing 3


Ha!  Fooled you.  Thought of another thing.  If I continue to eat Quiznos Honey Bourbon Chicken and subsequently each time spill some sauce on my shirt, which incidentally, stains and does not come out, I think I will need to go shopping.  Maybe the weekend my husband is in an all day Saturday conference for Toast Masters (which in my head I pronounced as Teletubbies).  And now I'm laughing out loud, and not able to proofread this. 




Thing 4


There's really not a Thing 4, it's just acknowledgement that I can't count.  Which is not news at all, to anyone.



Monday, March 12, 2012

Short and Sweet

Tonight, after fighting with my newly re-OS'd computer and getting printers up and running because all I wanted to do was print some coupons, the following conversation ensued:


Me:  What was the thing that had the cloud that had the 2 free things?


Mister:  Drop box?


Me: Yup that's it.


The moral:  My husband speaks tired me.  Which is a really really good thing.  :)

Cookie and the Coloring Book

Before I post about this, I need to confide in y'all that I miss the "u" that Canadian words have.  It makes them seem fuller or more balanced or something.  I no longer type them in by accident anymore but I still think it looks strange to type "color" instead of "colour".  I also think it's fairly heinous of Microsoft to make me choose one spell check language.  But that's a rant for another day.


Now onto the show.  Erm, story.


A few days ago one of my Facebook friends posted a NSFW link to a coloring book. Since I was at work, and despite the fact that we have relatively little issue around such things, I decided not to click it.  (Okay the real reason was that I was actually super-busy at work.  I know, right?  What's up with that??)


I did, however, feel the need to send it on to my work partner-in-crime.  You remember her from this post (and if you haven't read it, then you're behind and a bad reader.  No cookie for you.  Heh, get it?  Because it's FUNNY!).


I prefaced the link with the fact that it was not for children's viewing without some discussion and that she should make sure her impressionable youngsters did not get a full view without some dialogue.  


A coloring book seems innocuous enough, but this was an aid to discussing reproduction with children...and it was a coloring book of vaginas.


Oh baby, oh baby
Now I'm not anything like a prude, nor am I against understanding and knowledge.  I was taught the "facts of life" (you take the good, you take the bad...) age-appropriately and knew how babies were made from the age of 5 or so.  My parents encouraged questions and answered them without stigmatizing anything to do with the sex act.  I remember being at friends' houses and sharing their books on the birds and the bees (complete with cartoon people who looked nothing like Barbie and Ken).  Actually thinking about it now, those cartoon characters kind of looked like Peter Griffen.  Both of them.           


But I have to admit, the vagina coloring book is kinda weirding me out.  I mean, I get that it could be very useful...but I'm having trouble picturing some child sitting down and coloring in the anatomically correct hoo-hoo.  I can't imagine it holds any major attraction...it's not like a Disney Princess or Dora the Explorer.  There's nothing really tangible for a child to connect with.  And older kids, who might be around the timing to actually learn from it, would generally seem to be well past coloring stage.


In and among this confusion, I ship the link off to Cookie, mostly for a laugh, truly.  And of course, her pre-teen daughter walks in on her looking at it, full screen, vag-city.


"Ewwww MOM!"


The obvious connotation that her Mom spends the work day pre-occupied with sex aside, that seems to be a pretty clear indictment of the vagina coloring book...when the intended audience is really not all that interested.


And I'm not even going to tell you all about the sperm cookbook link I sent her too.  Suffice it to say, the interwebs are a vast and scary place, and Facebook is an automatic delivery system.